Build a Stronger Connection—With Each Other and Yourselves
Relationships aren’t static—they evolve, and sometimes, they struggle. Whether you’re stuck in cycles of conflict, experiencing emotional distance, or unsure how to repair a breach of trust, couples therapy offers more than a place to vent. It provides a structured process for healing, reconnection, and change.
With over two decades of experience—including advanced training in the Gottman Method (Levels 1–3), Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy—I support couples across the full spectrum of relationship dynamics. Our work will be collaborative, research-informed, and tailored to your needs.
The Miracle Question
Imagine this: While sleeping, the problems between you and your partner were resolved. The tension over finances, parenting disagreements, unresolved resentment, in-law drama, and communication breakdowns—all gone.
Now ask yourself:
- What would you notice when you woke?
- How would you feel toward your partner?
- What would your partner say or do differently?
- What would be the first thing you’d do together?
This isn’t a fantasy. It’s a proven therapeutic tool called The Miracle Question—one I often use to help couples begin envisioning the change they need. It doesn’t dismiss the difficulty of your journey; it reframes it as possible.
When Do Couples Need Therapy?
Couples therapy is not only for relationships “in crisis.” It can also be a proactive space to build communication skills, deepen emotional intimacy, or prepare for major life transitions.
Common concerns I work with include:
- Ongoing arguments that never resolve
- Emotional withdrawal or detachment
- Intimacy issues or sexual disconnection
- Parenting conflicts and stepfamily integration
- Trauma, grief, or loss affecting the relationship
- Post-affair repair or trust rebuilding
- Premarital or commitment-related uncertainty
- Navigating life stages (career changes, retirement, empty nesting)
What to Expect in Our Work Together
Every couple brings a unique story to the room. I honor that by designing a personalized treatment plan, integrating evidence-based approaches:
🔹 Gottman Method Couples Therapy
We use structured interventions to reduce conflict, increase empathy, and rebuild emotional bonds. You’ll learn to manage “The Four Horsemen” (criticism, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling) and develop a shared vision for your future.
🔹 Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT)
Here, we get to the heart of the disconnection—helping you recognize underlying attachment needs and emotional patterns. EFT helps couples move from blame to understanding, from distance to closeness.
🔹 Cognitive-Behavioral & Schema Work
These tools are especially effective when thought distortions, past trauma, or unhelpful relational schemas (like abandonment or mistrust) are keeping you stuck in old patterns.
The Developmental Model of Couples Therapy- Bader-Pearson
The Developmental Model views relationships as evolving through developmental stages, similar to human growth. Each of you may be at a different stage, and therapy supports you in moving together toward greater differentiation, connection, and emotional maturity.
Key Stages
- Symbiosis-” We are one.”. Focus on merging, sameness, and avoiding conflict.
- Differentiation-” I have my thoughts.” One or both partners begin expressing individuality.
- Practicing-” I want space and freedom.” Each partner is focusing on self-growth, often triggering the partner’s fears.
- Rapprochement:” Let’s connect deeply without losing ourselves.” By balancing autonomy and intimacy, the couple supports each other’s growth.
- Mutuality-” We thrive as individuals and as a couple.” The couple is maturely connected with emotional generosity, resilience, and shared vision.
Integrating the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy will equip you with skills to normalize struggle, clarify relationship stages, strengthen emotional boundaries, improve conflict skills, build empathy and self-responsibility, and allow long-term intimacy.
Esther Perel’s Approach to Couples Therapy
Esther Perel’s Approach offers you a path to deeper connection, renewed vitality, and mutual understanding by addressing both the emotional and erotic dimensions of your relationship. Utilization of her approach will help you understand that disconnection, conflict, and even infidelity are not signs of failure, but part of a larger story about unmet needs or cultural pressures reducing shame and opening a place for healing. The benefits of Perel’s approach complement the Gottman Method and other techniques:
Reignites erotic intimacy, I will help you rediscover play, curiosity, and imagination making space for sensual and emotional aliveness.
Move away from blame and into co-creation
Techniques to expand your emotional vocabulary enable you to discuss beliefs about love, gender, and power, encouraging honest, courageous conversation rather than reactivity.
Strategies to deconstruct harmful messages (about sexuality, shame, masculinity, or shame)
Allows you to explore as a couple without judgment: I offer a non-pathologizing place to explore topics like monogamy, infidelity, sexual trauma, or non-traditional relationship models.
Restore hope and emotional connection, a place to repair, re-connect, and re-imagine your relationship.
Help you ask each other: “Who am I when I am with you? and “How can we become better versions of ourselves together?”
Collaborative Couples Therapy (CCT)
Collaborative Couples Therapy is an extension of one specific area of Gottman Therapy, the idea that there are both solvable and perpetual problems. This therapy takes the approach that any situation, whether perpetual or solvable, can be dealt with in a manner that allows you to create intimacy. The ability to have an intimate conversation is CCT’s goal.
Solution-Focused Brief Couples Therapy (SBFT)
This empirically validated approach to couples therapy is future-oriented, encouraging you to concentrate on goals rather than dwelling on past problems, providing a positive outlook. I help you to recognize both of your strengths and resources, fostering a sense of empowerment and capability. This approach uses language and structured conversations to help you improve communication. SFBT is a versatile approach that is effective in addressing various relationship issues. By integrating SFBT, I provide concrete clinical techniques and practical strategies so you can implement solutions immediately.
Therapy Tailored to You
Some couples want short-term support around a specific issue. Others need deeper work to rebuild trust or rewire emotional patterns. We’ll set clear goals together—from day one—and adjust as your needs evolve.
Whether you seek repair, clarity, or prevention, therapy offers a structured path forward.
Your Relationship Deserves Support
If you’re feeling disheartened, discouraged, or simply unsure where to begin, you’re not alone—and you’re not without options. Most couples wait too long to seek help. Don’t let resentment become the loudest voice in the room.
Let’s begin a new conversation—one rooted in understanding, empathy, and possibility.
📍 In-person and virtual sessions available for Illinois residents
📞 Book a Consultation